Unabridged Disney Song Intros: Under the Sea, The Little Mermaid

Sebastion: Ariel listen to me
The human world is a mess
life under the sea is better than anything they got up there


Sebastion: And besides, you’re a young girl who has been forced into a premature fame by your royal heritage, so it’s extra important that you, of all people, don’t compromise this kingdoms secrecy nor sovereignty by exposing our ‘mythical’ existence to humans, who we can all agree are absolutely monstrous when facing something they don’t understand.


Sebastion: And, also, you have no way of knowing this but your circulation structure isn’t really built for that sort of respiration, so you’d like desiccate in a matter of days


Sebastion: And I can’t really speak to being bipedal because you know I have like MANY more legs than just two, but don’t you think there’s something unnatural about a society that walks upon two legs? You don’t find that shit ANYWHERE else in nature except birds, who are honestly a disaster. We all know birds are a disaster. You know ONE bird and he’s a mess. Just think about it!


Sebastion: Anyways, here’s some more info about the aquatic sanctuary you unknowingly inhabit, you prissy brat.


*music plays*

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